The Difference Between Being Afraid and Being Brave

Adrian S. Potter
3 min readFeb 20, 2022

It’s what you do after you shit your pants that counts.

Photo by DJ Johnson on Unsplash

My dad served in the Korean and Vietnam Wars. His drill sergeant mentality provided me with an anxious childhood. I was an oops kid, an alleged happy accident who was spawned in the mid-autumn of his life. I also represented his sole attempt at fatherhood.

His military-steeped paternal advice was rough around the edges. But it was still potent.

One story that stuck with me was when he explained the narrow gap separating panic from courage. Based on his combat experience, he was well equipped to teach this lesson.

With casualties and change as constants in Vietnam, my dad would sometimes have a mix of seasoned veterans and fresh recruits in his fold. Often the newbies would be scared, and rightfully so. But many newer soldiers would feign toughness and claim to be unfazed, even if they were terrified.

Occasionally, one would confess their fears. My dad said he would make an example of them, but not in the way one might guess.

My dad would announce to everyone that he trusted the man who admitted to being afraid since he was courageous enough to be honest.

“There’s no shame in saying you’re scared. It’s the fools who are afraid but claim they aren’t…

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Adrian S. Potter

Antisocial Extrovert · Writer and Poet, Engineer, Consultant, Public Speaker · Writing about self-improvement, gratitude, and creativity · www.adrianspotter.com